The Girl Boss Movement was a trap yall! Did you fall into it? I did 🤦🏾‍♀️.

A Catch-22, A Hoax …The Girl Boss Era was a myth and didn’t work for Black women. To be honest, we really weren’t included in the movement, made famous by Sophia Amoruso to begin with. Let me take you back to the time period between 2014-2019 - where female capitalism and female corporate empowerment as at an all-time high.

This is the same movement that was telling women to just put their head down and grind it out. And making suggestions like, if you’re not getting what you want in your life or career then it must be your fault somehow. You must not be trying hard enough, or you must not be consistently putting in the work. LIES! We were told if we need to fix something, it should start with ourselves.

Dirty lies like you can get there or you can have it all if you’re strong enough.

This ignores systemic blockers and challenges that impact the day-to-day lives of Black women. Things like the glass ceiling and lack of pay equity for Black women in Corporate America. It ignores the realities of resources for working moms and the fact that when men become parents they often make more money and when women become parents they see their salaries decrease significantly. According to Forbes and USA Today , “ That means they stand to lose $17,000 annually, but the wage gap widens and losses are even greater for women of color: Black mothers lose an average of $34,000 compared to white fathers, Native American mothers $36,000 and Latina mothers $38,000.”

It ignores opportunity equity and educational equity. The struggle has always been real! These are the extra layers of life that exhaust us.

This leads us to The Black Women’s Superhero Syndrome or S.B.W. (Strong Black Women) . Let me give you the dets. According to Dr. Cheryl L. Woods-Giscombe, a UNC-Chapel Hill professor, Black Women’s Superhero Syndrome happens when Black women feel societal pressure and an obligation to engage in the following behaviors:

The syndrome acts as a liability and an asset in the white workplace, most times leading to anxiety, extreme stress, depression, weight loss, and sometimes permanent damage to physical, psychological, mental, and emotional health. This is generational trauma and a survival mode tactic. Operating from a place of “being twice as good to be good enough” or living in burnout culture and “hustle mode” as the only way to so-called make it.

Sis, this is not the way. Let’s remember the words of the late great philosopher, Audre Lorde, “ Rest is resistance”. “Self-care is self-preservation”. 👑

Often rest, soft life, mental health breaks, and quitting are all reserved for White women or non-BIPOC women, and it’s up to us to claim and demand these things. We need to create space for these things, and be intentional about designing our lives around it. Sometimes self-care for Black women at work needs to involve challenging what’s considered normal, challenging what they thought a Black woman leading should look like, challenging what doesn’t serve us or work for us anymore. 💅🏾

Its okay for things to fall apart sometimes. It’s okay to take all your PTO and then some. It’s okay for us to not do the most work or for us to simplify our lives to the fullest.

It’s Okay To Not Be Okay! OK!

Here is what you can do to embrace self-care and rest in the workplace to combat girl boss behavior and S.B.W:

✨Create a daily self-care routine and practices that supports your well-being

✨Humanize yourself at work - this means stop apologizing for everything and when you mess up just own it and move on. Be a little more vulnerable without fearing being fired. Say no and stick to your boundaries.

✨Stop rationalizing toxic behaviors and irrational behaviors at work - We take this on way too much. Just stop. Don’t justify mistreatment and disrespect. I’ve seen so many Black women let toxic, disrespectful people, experiences, and habits take residence in their heads and spirits. Protect your peace and advocate for yourself.

✨ Be where you are respected and celebrated and not tolerated. Listen, the best way your company can show their appreciation and celebrate you is with the bag! 💸💸 Not with more responsibilities, not with an email shout-out, not with a title promotion without a compensation increase! They can respect you with a seat at the table, with decision-making responsibilities, elevating and implementing your ideas and strategies, and respecting your boundaries and schedule. These are just some things to look out for, but I encourage you to make your own list of needs and non-negotiables.

We don’t need to just survive work experience, we need to thrive. It’s about reclaiming rest, joy, and peace and nurturing yourself ( whatever that may look like for you).

If you want to read more on setting boundaries at work and what “work-life balance means to me check out my recent featured article in AfroTech ( YASSSSS, ya girl was featured honey!!!)

Cheers to the weekend loves ( and cheers to my wins!) 💅🏾

Jeneba

For us by us! A few words from Black women in tech to encourage, inspire, and empower you.

Get To The Bag Job Search Strategy - Bloom friend and Luxury Career Coach, Cassie Ademola really drops gems in her newsletter for free. She shared her job search strategy and I’m adding it here to help. If you’re job searching without a strategy this is your sign to stop today. Do this instead 👇🏾

CASSIES SAYS :

First, I'll compile a list of the skills I'm passionate about and gifted in. Simultaneously, I'll create another list of skills I NO longer wish to utilize as they simply keep me busy without bringing REAL fulfillment.

Second, I'm setting my sights on a salary that goes beyond the 6-figure mark – a reflection of the value I bring from the list of my gifts. Then my talents need to leave NO HUMBLENESS online and on my resume.

Third, I'm immersing myself in studying job descriptions. Not just one or two, but around 15 to 20. This thorough research ensures I stay in sync with the pulse of the job market, my field, my industry and technology.

Then, I'll be making it known to the world... YOUR GIRL IS LOOKING.

[ GO GET THE BAG NOW BABE]

Wanna know the difference between Scrum Master and Project Manager? - It’s a common question, but we already have the answers. Check out this article and learn about both of these key roles.

Level Up Your LinkedIn - Whether you’re looking for a new role or not your LinkedIn profile in your new blog, your portfolio, or digital business card. It’s 2023, and it’s your digital footprint. Podcaster and LinkedIn expert, Hala Taha “The Podcast Princess” shares some tips on how to level your LinkedIn About Me section

A Quickstart Guide To A Program Management Career - If you need help communicating your value and talking about your transferable skills then you need this quick start guide from Jean Kang. Wanna transition into a Program Management role and don’t know where to start, this is for you.

Is Job Hopping The Only Way To A Bigger Bag? For me, that’s always been the case. It’s the play I’ve run my whole career, and it’s a strategy that I still use today to get a pay raise and give myself a promotion. Career and leadership coach, Melissa Fluery says “ You don’t need to leave your job to make an extra $20,000”. She shares four steps to get that money you want at your current job.

Did You Miss BaddieCon? - Well, good news! Program Manager, Jasmin Wooton shared her lessons learned from the conference and her guide to navigating a tech conference from a Program Manager’s perspective. I don’t about you, but I love reading a good tech conference recap from the Black women’s perspective!

Here’s a list of Bloomology-approved companies with remote jobs that are hiring this week #techistillhiring 🏢

Asana needs people in PeopleOps. Their looking for a Compensation Business Partner, Head of Compensation & Equity, Senior People Partner, Revenue and an HRIS analyst. They currently have 90 open positions.

POSIT is needs an Account Executive

The Anita B Org is looking for a Marketing & Research Analytics Manager

Splunk needs a Senior Content Marketing Manager

JasperAI needs an Account Executive ( they’re paying over $200K)

Atlassian needs an email marketing manager

Artisan Talent is sharing tips on how to start freelancing

Today is always a great day to level up or upskill in work or in life 👩🏾‍💻.

10 FREE Online Harvard Courses - Lydia Oshodi , leader in tech and career coach shared these FREE 99 Harvard courses.

ConsultHER - Navigating Success In Consulting For Black Women - Black Sistas in STEM shared this empowering, mentoring event to help Black women consultants.

How did you like today’s email? Would you tell a friend to tell a friend? Go ahead and share this with a woman who could really use it. Appreciate you! 👩🏾‍💻

I love hearing from you. Hit reply and let me know what you think!